Saturday, October 6, 2007

I will never forget


I walked into her bathroom and saw her hairbrush sitting on the counter next to the blow dryer, her shoes were just sitting there with socks stuffed inside, she was just there, she was suppose to come home.....but she didn't.

What happened? What is going on? This is not real. How is the horse here? Was she by herself? Who found her? Why weren't we called sooner? The first night we found out was confusion. No one knew what had happened to her and that was the hardest. Each day following we seemed to piece together what had happened, getting clues from the people around us, from the neighbors, police, and the woman who found her. The only question that still remains, what spooked the horse? We will never know.

These past few weeks have been a whirlwind of emotions; extreme sadness, loss, sorrow, joy, comfort, love, reassurance, numbness, disbelief. I grieve for the loss of my mother in law, for our relationship, but more than that I grieve for my husband who lost his mother and I grieve for our child who will never get to meet grandma. It breaks my heart to think of Brett not having his mom...... he loved her so much.

What has helped us through this time more than anything is all of the support and prayers. We have been showered with love, with cards, with flowers, with prayers, with food, it has been unbelievable and we know that God is taking care of us. S & L, you will never know how much it meant to me that you drove out here from Nebraska for the service. I know we didn't get much time together, but just knowing you were there meant more than you will ever know. Thank you D.C friend for the thoughtful card, it was just one of many that was so encouraging. Thank you A & E Hinkle for being at the viewing and the service, and sending the beautiful roses. Thank you N & J White for organizing people to bring us food. You realize how great and important friends are in a time like this, and I was overwhelmed with all the love sent.

Frans life touched so many people, even one's that she never met. There was a women who drove by the accident and saw that Fran was badly injured, life changed for that women at that instant, she realized how precious life was and she was encouraged when she realized Fran was a believer. God can bring back life in the midst of death.

To Memories of Frances R. Goodlin

-I will never forget the cheesy potatoes and dill chicken that were cooked at every meal you made
-I will never forget you helping me pick out my wedding dress and then blessing me by paying for it
-I will never forget fart spray in the eldorado house while playing liverpool rummy
-I will never forget how much you hated cooking, but did it anyway
-I will never forget your excitement when I first rode Harley
-I will never forget snowbiz, and how you brought it for our wedding
-I will never forget when I moved to Omaha, and you found a bed for me an we had to drive across town with it strapped on to the top of your jeep barely hanging on driving 20mph.
-I will never forget how you let Brett and me live with you and Dan for free for 6 months and how excited you were that you didn't have to cook.
-I will never forget how much you hated when I made cookies, but loved eating them
-I will never forget that Brett was your favorite
-I will never forget when you got to see our "little peanut" on the ultrasound (our last memory together)

I guess you did go home after all, it just wasn't the home I was thinking of.

4 comments:

  1. my family and i are so sorry for your loss. we know that you and brett will miss her dearly and will probably think of her everyday. my prayer for you now is that you can keep your eyes on the Lord and what he has for you in this next stage of life for you...as parents. may fran's example as a mother to you and brett be one you look to when you become a mother. i trust that you will love that little baby with all of your heart! i'm sending hugs your way...i love you, jenni.

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  2. This was such a sweet post, Jenni. Great memories of your mother-in-law. I, too, am so so sorry for your loss. I wish I could be there to give you a hug or make you a meal, but please know I'm still praying because I know it's not a pain that goes away quickly.

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  3. jenni, you write so well... i love you and brett so much. fran was an amazing woman and i will never forget my two weeks with your family. climbing to the top of the incline and you all praying for me as i was leaving for pakland. i'm happy to have meet fran and to be a part of your lives. you are a special couple!

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  4. This totally made me cry, Jenny. I miss cheesy potatoes too.

    And you are a VERY cute pregnant lady. And there is an In and Out Burger RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET from my apartment so you should come visit and we'll go every single day.

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