Sunday, March 20, 2011

How is it going with Norah?

The most common question I get asked is, "So how is it going with Norah?"  Usually I respond with "Good,"  but the answer is always a little more complex for those who are interested.

"Good" does generally sum up everything.  Norah is adjusting so well and I know so much of it has to do with her age.  She calls us mommy and daddy, comes to us when she is upset, wants us to hold her and comfort her, and like any almost 2 year old she defies us.  She can talk so much!!  She has such an amazing vocabulary and is about the same size as Maya that sometimes I think I expect to much out of her, sometimes I think she is older.  It is hard to remember what Maya was like at this stage even though it was only a year ago.  One of m favorite things Norah does is this cute face when she hears a noise (like a plane flying about), she whispers "noise" and does this face

Maya is doing so well also.  In some ways this has been harder for her, but she is really learning to share with Norah, help me more, and I think she knows Norah is staying for good.  I do tell Maya that Norah is adopted and in our family now because Norah's mommy is with Jesus.  Having Norah here has been so good for Maya.  One of the ways Maya has been so helpful is by folding laundry, she really likes it and is very good it at!  She says that "Jesus taught her"

The hardest adjustment is for me.   Let me first say that just because there are times that are stressful does not mean I don't enjoy having 2 children :O) Norah is a delight, but she doe not have a long attention span, so even if I give her something to do, she does it for about 2 seconds and then she wants me.  I can hardly rinse off a dish and put it in the dishwasher, before she pulls on me.  This has been very trying on my patience.  It is very hard for me to know if I should hold her non-stop and allow her to feel secure in me/us, and sometimes just let her cry because she is whining and should not always get what she wants when she whines.  I want there to be boundaries.

I do remember Maya being a little more needy at this age and wanting me to hold her, and I remember not Always holding her because she needed to learn.  I feel like with Norah I just hold her all the time though, rather than let her whine because I am afraid that she will think I don't love her.  Ahhhh it is so hard!  Where is the balance? Making dinner is the worst, Norah is very hungry and wants to eat, but she wants me to hold her the whole time I am cooking, and if I do, I can't cook anything.......... 

When I try to imagine what is going on in Norah's mind all I can think is that she probably thinks, "my mommy just left all of a sudden, and then my grandma, now I don't want this mommy to leave."  I just want her to know we aren't leaving........

Norah is the best huger in the world though! I think her hugs are more reassuring for me than anything

Daddys says, "Thinks are going really good." Norah does not do this same whinny thing with Brett (always wanting him to hold her), so if he is home alone with the girls his perception is that things are very easy and having 2 children is not that much harder.   He says the hardest thing is her random crying and difficulty in communication (which comes with any 1 year old).

I know that there are going to be seasons that are hard, especially when Norah gets older and we have to answer more questions, but for now we are enjoying her embracing our family and we are embracing her.


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  2. God Bless you and Brett... I enjoy reading your blog posts Jenni. You are a blessing and a person to look up to. Even though I didnt know Carrisa, I can say from reading your blogs that Nora is very lucky to have you as her 'new mommy'. Some day you will have more explaining to do, but for now, just enjoy and remember your precious memories... 4.07's!!!!!love you!!!

  3. No matter how you cut it, toddlers are difficult. You are doing famously and I am sure it is because you commit your way to the Lord everyday. We are all out here rooting for you, praying and leaning in, for you. If you have a melt down, just let it go, all parents with toddlers or kids of any age, feel like they are going crazy. I remember telling my two, when they would whine "Momma", your Mom is on vacation! And I used to say it very loud. Chuckle.

  4. Your blog posts are so honest and heartfelt. Makes my heart swell for you. Maya and Norah look like they really are sisters, they are so beautiful! I really just want to kiss Norah's chubby little cheeks. Meltdowns are the WORST, and in your situation, I can see how your mind is going in circles wondering how you handle them with Norah. Know that you are doing an excellent job and that you are not alone!

  5. What Wanda said!
    We're with you all the way, Jenni! With love, love, love!

  6. Jenni, Elle does the same thing with wanting me to hold her when I'm trying to make dinner every night, which makes it near impossible to actually cook. So hopefully it's just a little phase with the younger ones, and she'll grow out of it. :) You are definitely an inspiration, and are handling this whole transition with such grace. Keep it up! :)

  7. Jenni, You are so lovingly sensitive. You will always do your best because you CARE so much.
    Norah probably is a little more whiny as she has had the recent changes. Even if she is too young to think about her depth she knows. But lovingly expecting her to mind is fair. Every child with any type of "special need" should know that they must mind and then are showered with much love when the time is the time. With you and Brett operating in open honesty and the Lord' will cover it all.
    I was touched by the photos, especially of the one where Norah is hugging you. The girls are truly beautiful. Maya is, obviously, learning where her HELP comes from. What a darling.
    My heart is so full of the recognition of God's goodness.He is a very present help in this time. I call His name for you and your home. May you be blessed continually.
    Love you much,
    Cousin Fran

  8. I've been reading for a while, but I wanted to let you know how much I enjoy your posts! I am praying for you and your family, for wisdom to know when to be firm and when to give cuddles. :) My husband and I go to New Life and I found your blog through another New Life friend. My son is 20 months. is my blog.

    I'd love to get to know you sometime... I know you probably have lots of people wanting that.

    In any case, many blessings!

    In Him,

  9. You're doing great! I remember doing the same thing to my mom when she was cooking dinner; hanging on her leg like an octopus! I was hungry, too, which made both our moods worse; finally helped when she gave me some carrots and celery to chew on before she started cooking... might help with Norah...
    hugs, Auntie M.


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