Sometimes when I go home

Sometimes when I go home to California I still think I will see Carrisa......

Every time we go to my mom's house the whole family gets together, everyone comes over,  and for a second I had a hint of excitement that I was going to get to see Carrisa and tell her all about Norah, it was such a strange feeling.....

Sometimes when I go home I get the visitor who wasn't my best friend, but my sisters

Sometimes when I go home I want to soak up all the beauty that surrounds us, the trees, the smells, the moments that stand still, because this is the place I once new life without loss

Sometimes when I go home I just want to spend the entire time outside

Sometimes when I go home there are some really GREAT moments

 

and Sometimes when I go home I am reminded off the brokenness in our family, the hurt, the way we have all lost the same things

Sometimes when I go home it is hard to talk about

Sometimes when I go home I can see the walls we have built around each other, for protection, so scared of more hurt

but sometimes when I go home there is a moment, a place in time that we all enjoy one another, that we all enjoy the moment and hold onto it realizing how precious it is

Sometimes when I go home I have realized we have all had to learn a new normal, 

a family we never anticipated

and sometimes when I go home we get attacked by a mob of Chinese people thinking our family is some kind of anomaly.  haha if they only new the whole story