Dear Sarah

We are in September, this the birth month for Sarah, so I have been thinking about her a ton!  This is or you Sarah Eileen Goodlin.

Dear Sarah,

I am so excited to meet you soon!  You have been growing in my belly for almost 9 months.  I can feel you move everywhere, even right now as I write this.  I feel your little feet kicking and your hands pressing against my belly.  I have felt your hick-ups, your flips, and wiggles.  I love knowing that you are alive and active.  You are so very special to me.........such a gift.

You are going to enter this world as my 3rd daughter.  Some might say that the timing might not have been perfect, or that we will be overwhelmed with 3 daughters, but to me, God brought you to us at the perfect time, not when we expected, but when He wanted you here, and you have already been a huge blessing!  I have loved you from the moment I knew you were inside of me, my heart was broken during times where I thought we might have lost you.  I love that you are a little girl and God has formed your perfectly inside of me.  I love knowing that I will have 3 little girls!

Our family dynamic is not like everyone, Maya is your oldest sister, but Norah your 2nd oldest sister is also your cousin.  Norah also came into our family at an unexpected time, not very long ago, but she is ours and so are you.  As you become older we will tell you about our family, about the life and the loss and everything in between.  We will tell you about mommy/aunt Carrisa, who we miss so much.........  We will tell you that your middle name, "Eileen" is the same as hers.  We will tell you that while we were so sad and grieving her death God brought you into our life, giving us a glimmer of love and hope.   We will tell you about the family you should have known, my father Eugene, Brett's mother Fran and my brother Darren.  We feel so sad  that you will not get to meet them on earth......  We will tell you our life has constantly been filled with tragedy and loss, but we are always reminded of hope, the hope that comes with Christ, the hope that comes with the blessing of life like you.

I wish you did not have to come into the world with so much loss already surrounding you, but I pray everyday that you will never have to experience any of the loss that we have.  That you will have a mommy and daddy and all of your sisters for a VERY long time.   That you will be surrounded by unconditional love.  That you will know how truly special you are.

Your sisters Maya and Norah already love you so much!   Maya knew you were baby Sarah before we did.  She asks everyday if you are coming out and Norah squeezes my belly and says "my wuv baby Sarah." They give you lots of kisses and zerberts.  And Daddy, he already adores you, he is so happy to be having another little girl and can't wait to meet you!  He whispers secrets to you at night and feels you moving inside of me.

I have read and thought of this verse so many times as you have been growing in my belly

^{Psalm 139:}

¹³ For you created my inmost being;

   you knit me together in my mother’s womb.

¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

   your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

Sarah, please don't ever think that you aren't as special as my other daughters because you are the 3rd, you have an incredibly special place in my heart and in our family and we love you so much!

Love, Your mommy